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Mystery Science Theater 3000 is, to me, the greatest TV show of all time, bar none. The Wire ? Breaking Bad ? I spit derogatorily at them!...

Sunday, November 20, 2016

802 - Leech Woman


JED!!!

Leech Woman was only the second episode of MST3K’s un-cancelled 8th season, and it found Best Brains returning to riffing movies without missing a stride. Leech Woman is a stepping stone towards the greatness that is season 8, and the second of five sequential Universal International films. Though not an all-time classic, there’s a lot to love about this one, from a movie filled with detestable characters, stock footage and bogus science, to host segments mocking Planet of the Apes. What more could you want? Okay, dinosaurs and boobs, but let’s be realistic, here.

The movie follows a woman who, while on a trip to Africa with her abusive endocrinologist husband, discovers the secret to eternal youth by mixing extract from a rare flower with hormone extracted from the back of men’s heads in the pineal gland. So, she returns to America and goes on a pineal piercing spree in an attempt to stay young.

It’s curious to see the show growing into its new SciFi Channel era with Pearl as the baddie, the Planet of the Apes stage of the “Great Chase” plotline still going strong, and Corbett filling in as Crow. Corbett feels like he’s still working on his Crow voice, sounding a little too high pitched and nasally. But he feels natural in the theater, zinging off lines like, “I guess they came to Africa during animal convention time,” during the depth of the stock footage of animals, and in skits like plotting with Servo to kill Mike and take his pineal juice, the rascal. Meanwhile, the rest of the cast is having a blast on the Apes set, with Pearl growing from Dr. Forrester’s flighty mom to the true Fearful Forrester and Murphy, Nelson, and the others are having great time as the apes. I love Pearl’s line, when dictating arbitrary laws for the Apes, referring to herself as, “the great, and mighty and foxy Lawgiver,” and it’s interesting seeing a more erudite Bobo as opposed to the clown he becomes when Brain Guy takes the role as the smart one.

But the star, as usual, is the movie, and it’s got plenty to offer: despicable people, rampant alcoholism, rapid-fire riffing, and, as Crow says, “It’s not stock footage, it’s stock mileage at this point.” This poor main character, June: she has an awful, dismissive, verbally abusive husband, is almost comically alcoholic, turns young then old again, and murders people. What’s next, she gets audited? Oh and then there’s her new would-be beau Neil, a POS who starts hitting on Young June the second he meets her while his fiancé is STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO HIM   Mike and the Bots make each other chuckle a lot through this and most of season 8, which keeps a jovial, irreverent attitude flowing through the episode, like ripping on annoying coworkers with a good friend, and not to mention a ton of drunk and old people jokes! The jokes come so fast, funny and clever that there’s one I just got after seeing this episode for the umpteenth time almost 20 years after its airing: a leopard runs across the screen, and Servo says, “What? I can’t hear you, I’m deaf!” All in all this is a really fun episode from one of the best runs the show ever saw.



Random asides

-Who’s a worse actor, June's husband, Phillip Terry, or Lance Fuller in She Creature?

-Wouldn’t Dr. Paul Talbot, endocrinologist extraordinaire, make more money out of something that prolongs life than something that makes you young for like a day?

-Interesting how it’s not native hocus pocus that makes her young, but native bogus science that does the trick! Ah, the 50s.Er, 60s.

-The first host segment is okay, but man, are monkeys gross. I’m with the Nostalgia Critic: monkeys aren’t funny!

-My fave stretch of the episode is the last 3rd with Neil and is wife, where the scheme to turn young, and the romantic dancing around with Neil and his fiance and June’s older self are, as Mike says, “Like a murderous episode of Lucy.”

-Lol dumb robots. They forgot they don’t have the essence of the nipe plant and can’t make themselves immortal! Also, they’re robots and have lived like hundreds of years. Also, it’s a TV show.

-I love Mike and Tom dancing in the theater.

-Man, Tom goes nuts for the Beverly Hillbillies skit at the end. I love Mike strangling him.

-Tom’s gun fires, but there’s no effect. Sad that YouTubers like Angry Joe can do that affect now but MST couldn’t back then.

I love the way Murphy as Bobo pronounces "de-evolution"

-“Finger sandwich lawgiver?” “Why thanks, and here’s one for you!” *poke*

Holy hell, did Murphy do that credits “JED” in one, long take, or did they blend a few?

-Man, how can something that funny as the long “Jed!”, mixed with the somewhat melancholy MST theme, produce such a bittersweet mixture? That something hilarious was enjoyed but is now over? Sigh, each episode makes me miss the show and more excited for its return!

-Funny, seeing the difference between a Joel and Mike episode. I love the feelings of friendship of the Joel episodes, the but Mike ones, which often feel like them united against the movie, also give a feeling of camaraderie, of fellow soldiers in arms, deep in the trenches of war against a bad movie, laughing to keep each other sane, in the hope that one day, the crock climbing scenes will be over, there’ll be no more singing of “I sing whenever I sing”, but also a sadness that when the war is over, so is the friendship.
Repeat to myself, it’s just a show….



Episode in a riff
Good night, everyone! Old women are evil.



My Top 6 Favorite Riffs from the episode:




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